Category: Humor
Cheer Setting
by Josie
Tim Ferriss attributes much of his success to the practice of “fear setting“: he takes a sheet of paper, divides it into three columns and labels them “Define”, “Prevent,” and “Repair.” Under the first column, write 10-20 things that could go wrong if you answer your question in the affirmative. Under the second column, answer: “what could I do to prevent each of these … Read More Cheer Setting
Correspondence with the Guardian
by Josie
Dear Sir or Madam— Do you know who I am? Am I as much a part of your day, as you mine? I run past your gate nearly every day—at alternating times, as it is, but nearly every day. Whatever I may be thinking, be pondering, be musing, you take me right out of it. Your great woooooof!s boom through me like the deep … Read More Correspondence with the Guardian
Conversations with my Subconscious
by Josie
It was 5:15 a.m. and my hands felt like doorknobs stapled to my wrists. My fingers had been absorbing the bulk of rain-wind-early-morning-wintery-chill combo, and I had to garner support from at least three of them to shift the gears on my bike. I’d long since forgotten I possessed toes. I was biking to Il Forno, the Italian bakery at which I play brunch … Read More Conversations with my Subconscious
Squiddy Library
by Josie
The library is, for me, punctuality’s greatest weakness. Especially Auckland’s public library, a carefully laid, intertwined system of so many books in so many libraries dotting so many corners. I can’t seem to sweep my gaze from east to west without spotting a library. They call to you.
Not Your Run-of-the-Mill Pee
by Josie
It happened while I was emptying the tank in the city center train station bathroom my pink backpack clinging to life on the silver handle kicking up legs so as not to touch lava.
Blood, Sweat and Tears
by Josie
By the time I reached the taxi stand underneath the bridge, it was 10:40 in the morning and beads of sweat were dripping into all the wrong places. My jeans were suctioned to the backs of my legs and I kept wiping my brow on my flowy cardigan which sort of felt like scrapping sandpaper against damp skin. Little bits of me, thanks to … Read More Blood, Sweat and Tears
The Art of Sleeping on Public Transportation
by Josie
We learn and master and cultivate passion through practice. We aren’t born with the ability to read. We aren’t born with the ability to do woodworking. We aren’t born with a longing for the perfect cup of coffee. Everything is a practice. Even passion is a practice; we practice and practice and in this manner we cultivate our own passions. We truly can learn … Read More The Art of Sleeping on Public Transportation
Woman vs. Rooster
by Josie
I write this at my own peril. But, alas, perhaps my end shall come anyways. Perhaps the dawn may never come for me again. But no. I cannot give up hope. I cannot give in to the fear. I must tell my story. You must know. I arose before dawn and after the second chorus of the sunrise call to prayer. The world was … Read More Woman vs. Rooster
Writing Ideas from Stage One of Sleep
by Josie
I have a notebook and pen beside my bed at all times because some of my most comical moments occur when I wake up and remember that I had written an idea down sometime in the middle of stage 1 or 2 of sleep. I would like to share a few of these with you, in hopes that they amuse you as much as … Read More Writing Ideas from Stage One of Sleep
Being Aware
by Josie
Before coming to Indonesia, so many people told me: “Josie, you need to make sure you are aware of your surroundings at ALL times. Be safe.” To honor those who told me this, I would like to give proof that I am following their advice. Peace and blessings, Josie
The Subtle Cello
by Josie
The cello is the most subtle Of the four-piece orchestra. More subtle than the viola Even though many might disagree– The viola is too subtle So it is suspicious Indeed the most suspicious of the lot. And most often the viola is left out anyways In favor of two violins. What can you do with a viola that You couldn’t pay a violin to … Read More The Subtle Cello
The Non-Conformist Book Club
by Josie
What are the requirements for nonconformity? Why, it’s simple really: First, you should join the club Of individuals who practice Nonconformity together as one. Then you must get a tattoo, The location of which Is entirely up to you. This will showcase your dedication To individuality and nonconformity. For design ideas and tattooist recommendations Please consult the guidebook below Or ask your fellow nonconformist. … Read More The Non-Conformist Book Club
