I know you are out there. I know that you are reading this. I want you to know that I am like you, too. That you are not alone. That it’s okay. Let’s say it together, out loud.
We know who we are; even taking off the watch for the shower is a bit disconcerting at times. What time is it? one might ask themselves as one pops up the wrist for a quick peek, only to fall back cognitively disillusioned at the surprising bareness. The unfortunate days that fall between one watch breaking and the securing of another watch are days shrouded in dissonance. It’s a time of subconscious confusion because underneath the facade of organization, we are addicted to the time.
This past week the Universe set up a personal session of Time-oholics Anonymous for me while I was moseying around Lake Garda, Italy with my three buddies. Half a day into our four day jaunt, my watch flashed the low battery you fool signal to me and promptly went blank.
I went through the stages. Initially I was a bit taken wholly aback, shock. Then I was optimistic and popped the watch into my bag thinking, I don’t need you!, denial. Then I began to get antsy as looking at my wrist no longer brought the initial waves of satisfaction over having control of my day that it used to, facing the problem. As the first day ended, I realized that not being controlled by this constant reassurance of time rendered me more capable of listening to my body. Listening to when I was actually hungry instead of knowing when dinner time was. Listening to when I was getting tired and cranky instead of knowing how many hours of sleep I would be able to get that night. Surrender. Self-awareness.
In all honesty, the first half day of not wearing a watch and not having a phone with the time easily on hand was noticeably disconcerting. When one knows the time, one can think, Alright, it will take 20 minutes to walk here, and then 30 minutes to explore this, and then 15 minutes to walk to the square, and then 10 minutes to find a place to eat, and then an hour and a half for a nice dinner, and then that should put us back at the train station 30 minutes prior to the departure of our train.
But a day subdivided with this kind of control is an illusion; when it comes to a day, especially a day traveling, we don’t have the control we think we do. Surprises happen, delays occur, traffic is heavier than expected, better things to see pop up in hidden places, the planned-upon restaurant is too expensive. When I believe that I have control of the day, I am inevitably disappointed.
A lot of this disappointment stems from being addicted to time.
After the watch came off, the vacation started. We ate when we were hungry, we slept when it was dark and we were tired, we were more in-tune with the timetables of departure. Not having access to a phone was magical, too; we hiked around Lake Garda walking from Salo to surrounding towns with nothing but a ripped-up map and our eager thumbs waving down cars.
We became explorers.
Traveling this way is how vacations should work. Vacation should be changing your routine as wholly as possible in order to give yourself a break from your well-established life at home. Don’t let time disappoint you.
Peace & Blessings,